California parents who get a divorce can make the process easier on their children by making an effort to get along with one another. Even if parents are angry at one another, they should avoid showing their children this. At minimum, they should make an effort to be civil to one another and avoid telling children about the other parent's faults. They should also try to be communicative about scheduling changes. Child support should be paid on time.
There may be times when it is necessary for parents to attend the same event, such as a child's graduation. Parents need to focus on setting aside any differences they have at this time. They should try to speak positively to one another and about one another if possible. Ideally, at least in the early days during or after the divorce, parents could even plan an occasional family night together, such as a game night or family dinner.
How parents treat their children is also important. Some parents may spend too much money on their children in an effort to become the favorite parent. Parents should focus instead on making good memories. They should reassure their children that they love them and that they are not at fault in the divorce. They should also try to minimize disruption in their children's lives.
There are a few circumstances in which this approach might not be appropriate. A parent might be concerned about the child's safety with the other parent because of abuse or addiction. However, parents should distinguish between this and situations in which they simply disapprove of the other parent's approach to raising children. As long as a child is not in danger, family law courts generally decide custody based on the belief that the child thrives when spending time with both parents despite these differences.