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3 tips if you want a divorce, but your spouse does not

While marriages end for a variety of reasons, spousal disagreements are a common cause. As such, if you and your spouse cannot agree on financial matters, child-rearing rules, household tasks or other topics, you may be ready to call it quits. Your spouse, however, may not be on the same page. 

California law has very few legal requirements for filing for divorce. Importantly, spousal agreement is not one of them. Nonetheless, if you and your spouse can reach some consensus about the end of your marriage, your divorce is apt to be easier. Here are three tips that may help if you want a divorce, but your spouse does not: 

  1. Have a frank conversation

If you have a long history of having unproductive arguments with your spouse, proactively discussing divorce may be challenging. Nonetheless, you should try to be honest with your husband or wife. Explaining why you want a divorce is essential. You should not do all the talking, though. If you listen carefully to your partner’s concerns, you may increase your odds of finding common ground. 

  1. Give the matter some time

You probably should not expect your spouse to change his or her mind immediately. On the contrary, individuals often need some time to accept a different opinion. Furthermore, your partner may want an opportunity both to grieve the end of your union and to adjust to a changing way of life. Accordingly, before starting the divorce process, you may want to give the matter some time. 

  1. Request a trial separation

Because divorce may have some negative connotations for your spouse, you may want to take an intermediate step. With a trial separation, you and your spouse live separately. This time apart may help your partner see divorce as the right option. 

Even if you and your spouse have major disagreements about most things, jointly deciding to end your marriage may be helpful. Remember, though, reaching a consensus may take both time and patience. Still, because there are advantages to doing so, trying to come to an agreement is likely worth the effort.