Talking to your children about divorce can be challenging. At the same time, you are well aware that it’s an important and necessary conversation. You want to make it go well for your children.
You have likely never been through this situation before, so it may be helpful to get some tips from those with more experience. Here are a few things you can do during this conversation.
Have the talk as a family
First of all, this should be a family conversation. If you have multiple children, it’s best to talk to them all at the same time to ensure that they hear about the divorce from you – not from a sibling or through the grapevine. Additionally, you and your spouse should seek to present a united front, demonstrating that you both care about the kids.
Don’t blame anyone
It’s also wise not to play the blame game, actively blaming your spouse for the divorce. Even if you do think it was their fault, take a more neutral tone with the children. It’s helpful to assure the children that the divorce isn’t their fault, as this is often something kids worry about.
Answer questions about upcoming changes
Finally, don’t end the conversation without giving the children a chance to ask questions. They may want to know where they’re going to live, when they’re going to see each specific parent, if this means they need to move to a different school, and much more. Talk to them about these upcoming changes so they know what to expect.
Once the divorce process is in motion, be sure you know about your legal options to continue putting your children first.
