The news that you are divorcing is likely to hit your kids hard. Thankfully, with them off school for the summer, you have time to help them get used to the changes. But, pretty soon they are going to have to return to school.
While it might be a relief for them to return to an unchanged environment, it could also be a source of anxiety, as they wonder how to explain things to people at school. Perhaps they feel a bit embarrassed. Or maybe they know some kids will use it as an excuse to taunt them.
Here are some ways you can help them prepare:
Explain to them that divorce is normal
Your child probably has several classmates whose parents have divorced, and perhaps even some teachers are divorcees. Pointing this out could help your child realize that it is nothing abnormal and that they should not feel as though they are the odd one out, or have a dirty secret to hide.
Help them practice some answers to questions
People will no doubt ask them how their summer went. Some may have heard about the divorce and ask questions about it. It is easy for a child to think others are asking from a judgmental position. Most won’t be. They’ll just be asking out of innocence, curiosity or sympathy. Nevertheless, helping your child devise some responses they are happy to give at this point in time can help. It might just be “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
Consider informing the school
If teachers know you are divorcing it allows them to keep an eye on your child to see how they are coping. It also allows them to view any out-of-character behavior in a more understanding light and offer support where needed.
If you can also find a way to handle your divorce and custody arrangements more amicably, keeping your child’s best interests in mind, that too will be a massive help in supporting your child through this challenging time.
